There is a place in the human psyche that is so dark, so despairing that to live for even a few seconds becomes intolerable. I have been there, and the only thing that anchored me to this world was my cat. Who would take care of my cat when I was ended? For him, I had to draw myself back from the edge. Over time, the storms lifted, and with the help of love and a good medical team, I regained the sun.
What makes us go to those places of inner hell? Is it the devil or a chemical imbalance in the brain? My demon is called GAD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I’ve had it for as long as I can remember and it will be with me forever. I’m okay today, but what about next time I fall in that misery pit? Shrouded in mundanity, it lurks around every corner. I cannot predict its coming; I only know it will come, in a year, a decade. A day? Unsuspecting, I’ll fall again, and I can only hope I have a good cat on hand to help me up.
Rest finally in peace, Robin Williams. I am not you after all.
~ Harry ~
